What is 100 yards long and has 2 front teeth? She held his fragile hand, tears were running down her face, and she prayed for her husbands pain to end. A: So they can park in handicap spaces. USC Trojans. Nov 26, 2022; Columbus, Ohio, USA; Michigan Wolverines head coach Jim Harbaugh (right) and Ohio State Buckeyes head coach Ryan Day (left) shake hands before the game at Ohio Stadium. Screw the blue, another Ohio State fan said. Terms at draftkings.com/sportsbook. Enjoy! I know this was done at least once before, but it was awhile ago and I just re-watched the HBO special on the Michigan-OSU rivalry and the jokes at the end made me laugh. Im not a Spartan fan either, the boy says. #1. Why would it not? Why does the wind blow South in Michigan? But not a good feeling for Ohio State fans. Q: What does a girl from Columbus do if she's not in bed by 10pm? Upon closer inspection it turns out to be a genies lamp. Jokes4us.com Privacy Policy, submissons by: natertater2016, matthew9679, unk.mars, buckeye098. Daten ber Ihr Gert und Ihre Internetverbindung, wie Ihre IP-Adresse, Browsing- und Suchaktivitten bei der Nutzung von Yahoo Websites und -Apps. The Buckeyes scored a touchdown within the first five minutes of the game, and the pace only picked up from there, as quarterback C.J. Two Ohio State football players were hootin and hollerin while partying on campus when a bartender asked them why they were celebrating. "Those are deer tracks" states the buckeye fan. Q: Why did Bowling Green State change their uniforms to Orange? With that the dog jumped up on the couch, and began giving high-fives to everyone. Motorwerks Imports Meyer spent seven years at Ohio State, leading the Buckeyes to an 83-9 record and a National Championship for the 2014 season. A: They all lost on the final kick. The other frightens birds and small animals. Nice joke, but there is great irony in your spelling. I don't allow stuff like that in my house!" Mike got down on his knees and begged. Related: Michigan finally beats Ohio State, punches ticket to Big Ten title game, It just feels great. Still cant believe these guys beat Ohio State. Youre outta your mind! Q: Why do Akron Zips fans smell so bad? A: Put them in a big Bowl and beat for 3 hours. A: The swelling from your head from getting jacked! Anyways, there are some good ones in here, 2022 MGoBlog. So, were bringing that to the pages of LGHL with our favorite head-to-head column: Youre Nuts. An OSU alum and a UM alum are standing next to each other in the men's room. Q: What's the best thing to ever come out of Michigan? The dog was wearing a Michigan jersey and helmet, and was festooned with Michigan pom-poms. Q: How many Ohio State freshmen does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Q: Did you hear about the fire in Ohio State University's football dorm that destroyed 20 books? Put on a show, C.J. Cant really talk shit since we lost to them but Im thoroughly enjoying this so far. Q: Why aren't Akron cheerleaders allowed to do the splits? A: One, but he gets 3 credits. Albert Breer (@AlbertBreer) January 1, 2022. Q: Why do they throw out a sack of manure at University of Michigan weddings? pic.twitter.com/hm7Ik3rT59. Is this supposed to be a contribution to the post? The OSU alum thinks for a minute and then agrees. A: They choke whenever they get near a bowl. AZ, CO, CT, IL, IN, IA, KS, LA, (select parishes), MD, MI, NH, NJ, NY, OH, OR, PA, TN, VA, WV, WY, CA-ONT only.Eligibility restrictions apply. A: Who cares? Ohio State co-offensive coordinator Ed Warinner cracked some jokes about Michigan during the team's spring football kickoff luncheon. The game looked over long before the second quarter ended. A: Thirty students were stuck on the escalator for three hours. Call 1-800-GAMBLER. In reply to Punch line mega fail. now = new Date(); year = now.getYear(); exclaimed the bartender. Now, you still wanna tell me that joke? The first guy says, No, not if Im going to have to explain it three times.. The big game began with the Wolverines receiving the kickoff. Michigan should be favored over Ohio State in The Big House, but by only one point is very telling. Ohio State Jokes Congrats to Ohio State, you didn't have the worst performance of the evening . It's all the same dude. A: Ohio Sucks Reading this blog for years, but finally registered for this thread so I could post the only joke I know. Dies geschieht in Ihren Datenschutzeinstellungen. Bucketheads Podcast: Ohio State looks to be playing better basketball approaching the B1G tournament, Why is this News? Look for this years installment of The Game between Michigan and Ohio State to potentially come down to the wire. now = new Date(); year = now.getYear(); Whom do you shoot? Finally a train hit them. Q: What happens when blondes move from Michigan to Ohio? I'm guessing they don't have a cartography section at the library. And there before Coach Meyer is a scene of unbridled joy. All rights reserved. Did you hear that the Ohio State University library burned to the ground? Mike W. walked into our living room with a dachshund under his arm. Q: What's the only thing that grows in Cleveland? "I want an impenetrable wall built around the entire state of Ohio so that none of those stupid Michiganians can ever get in. The contract offer was already raising some eyebrows when it was reported as Tucker had spent . Q: Why do all the trees in Michigan lean south? Guess everyone has heard that one already q: what's the only sign of intelligent life in columbus? I thought Ohio State leading Michigan State 49-0 at the half was impressive until I saw that Georgia is leading Charleston Southern 49-0! Q: Why do the Ohio State Buckeyes eat cereal straight from the box? Jake was dying, but his beloved wife Becky was maintaining a candlelight vigil by hospital bedside. So they can park in the handicapped spaces. "deer", "dog", "deer", "dog" they argued. A: Because Tennessee sucks and Ohio blows. Posted on September 10, 2009 by oppy1984 Posted in Funny. But I wouldn't try it." In reply to No lightbulb jokes yet? RT @Menace2Sports: HOLD UP. What is a buckeye anyways, man?. Mekka Don (@MekkaDonMusic) January 1, 2022. Ohio State vs. Michigan Jokes Posted on 2014-11-29 UPDATED: November 29, 2014 __________ Mike W. walked into our living room with a dachshund under his arm. I work for Automattic. I dont know, Ive only had him for four years.. The Total Fishing Manual (Paperback Edition): 318 Essential Fishing Skills (Field & Stream) ASIN:1681882639 | EAN:9781681882635 | ISBN:1681882639. You have a gun with only two bullets remaining. Q: What does the average Central Michigan student get on his SAT? Ultimately, Ohio State is a potential regression candidate. C.J. Thanks for doing it correctly. Q: What do you call a good looking girl on the University of Michigan campus? No one should expect to make money from the picks and predictions discussed on this website. 1 Georgia and Charleston Southern, which also had a 49-0 halftime score. A: About $80,000 per sheet. A: They go blue. If you have your own favorite Ohio State joke, add it in the comments below. 4 Ohio State obliterated No. (Photo by Ben Jackson/Getty Images). The. A guy in a bar leans over to the guy next to him and says, "Wanna hear a Buckeye joke?" Practice in Ann Arbor was delayed for two hours yesterday when one of the players happened to look down and noticed a suspicious looking, unknown, white powdery substance on the field. Odds & lines subject to change. He locates the exact room, knocks on the door, and a Buckeye player lets him in. In a recent USA Today article by Buckeyes Wire, Ohio State author Phil Harrison claims that Jim Harbaugh and the Michigan Wolverines are "ripping off" Ohio State's gold pants tradition. Pothole season is pretty much year round anymore. Q: How many OSU students does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Although Michigan has won The Game each of the last two years, the two-time reigning Big Ten champions were joined by Ohio State in the most recent College Football Playoff. I'm really sorry." A: A visitor. Every year. A: She applies to Cleveland State. But that doesnt matter anymore. All betting content is intended for an audience ages 21+. The rest of the country is jealous of Buckeye Nation. 7 Michigan State just three days after it was reported that MSU was planning to offer Tucker the 10-year deal worth $95 million. The guy sitting next to him is 6-5, 250 pounds and is also a Michigan graduate. He fell from the horse and was nearly trampled to death. and I am an Ohio State Graduate. Ohio fans rushed the field, pulled up all their own grass turf and started throwing it at the band. Last time I tipped back a Wolverine I couldnt stop till the tenth one. One foggy night, a Buckeye fan was heading north from Columbus and a Michigan fan was driving south from Ann Arbor. He wrote SUCKS in sharpie on it. Twice. Ohio State Recruiting 2016: Everything You Need To Know, Ohio State Recruiting 2015: Everything You Need To Know, Stick to Sports podcast: Tia and Matt find out about The Game cancelation while recording, best Michigan jokes. The rest of the players have to dress themselves. Q: How do you make Ohio State cookies? 1. "Young man, if you're not a Buckeye fan, what are you?" Two months? The first guy says, "No, not if I'm going to have to explain it three times", Two Ohio State football players were hootin' and hollerin' while partying on campus when a bartender asked them why they were celebrating. Two boys are playing football at a park in Ann Arbor when one of the boys is suddenly attacked by a crazed Rottweiler. A: With the stadium, all the pricks are on the inside. Michigan once again has a Charmin soft non-conference schedule, Oregon Ducks football reinstates Traeshon Holden after brief dismissal, LIV Golf Posts Horrid Ratings For First Event of 2023, Early rivalry game odds for USC vs. Notre Dame revealed, Florida State sends ACC a warning shot amid rampant conference realignment, Early rivalry game odds for Texas vs. Oklahoma revealed. Q: What does a Great Lakes fish like to sing? For that punchline, you also need to update the question: Q: How many OSU student athletes does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Regardless, it seems as though the bookmakers view the final year of the Big Ten East as a two-team race between Michigan and Ohio State with plucky Penn State clearly as the third wheel once again. Q: What do you call a good looking girl on the Central Michigan University campus? Q: Why do Toledo students have such beautiful noses? . I loved that documentary. Q: What happens when Ohio State chokes? Q: Why do OSU students wear hats all the time? Why do ducks fly over Columbus, Ohio upside down? -0:00:001:05:01. Luckily, the manager of K-Mart came out and unplugged the horse just in time. Stroud racked up some incredible first-half stats while leading his team to a whopping 49-0 halftime score. I'm searching for my first hole-in-one. 440.521.9519, Palecek Motors Buckeyes fans are quite upset about it. Its a very good feeling, Brayden Cook said. A: The real tragedy was that 15 hadn't been colored yet. A young man hired by a supermarket reported for his first day of work. Simply put, that road win gives Ohio State way more wiggle room than Michigan. Q: How many University of Michigan fans does it take to screw in a light bulb? Just lay back and let the poison work.. A sports reporter who was strolling by sees the incident and rushes over to interview the boy. In reply to better punchline by Mgoscottie. A: So they can play the game, direct traffic, and pick up trash without changing. Theyre the best., The reporter smiles, starts a new sheet in his notebook and writes: Juvenile Delinquent From Columbus Kills Beloved Family Pet., One day my nephew decided to wash his sweatshirt. "Let's not forget that O-H-I-O is still a four-letter word.". South til you smell it. A: Punch him in the nose. ", Ok last one for now: I said, Hey! Yes, the missed kick in the College Football Playoff lined up perfectly with the New . The guy replies, "Well, before you tell that joke, you should know something. Her sobs and prayers roused Jake from his coma, and looking up at Becky, his pale lips began to move slightly. Q: Why did the Cincinnati football team cross the road? Q: Why did Woody Hayes leave Michigan Stadium early? Republicans reveal resolution demanding Pete Buttigieg RESIGN for his response to the train derailment, his Portugal vacation during rail strike talks and 'extended absences' amid supply chain crisis A Buckeye football player was almost killed today in a tragic horse back riding accident. Why cant Michiganders mention Ohio? Q: How do you get from Ann Arbor to Columbus? As they are walking, Lloyd trips over something in the sand. 6. But the Michigan fan doesn't have one, and the Ohio State fan says, "Aren't you going to have one too?" As they are walking, Lloyd trips over something in the sand. Q: What do you call someone who loves Michigan? A: The Crime Rate! A: Between Dayton & Marion. and pushes the representative from Ohio State off of the side of the mountain. That is the most amazing thing Ive ever seen! Q: Why are all the trees in Kentucky leaning to the south? The Georgia Bulldogs are winning with ease. One day, at an elementary school in Ann Arbor, Michigan, a teacher asked her class if the Michigan Wolverines were their favorite football team. The Ohio State fan says, "No no, I wasn't paying attention. The weather in Ohio is truly unpredictable. "You're crazy, those are dog tracks" Q: How many pallbearers are needed for a Buckeye funeral? A: Because it's the closet they will come to getting a "Degree". A: It stands for "Mostly Idiots". ~Both books were destroyed. A little boy and his mother were walking through an Ohio cemetery when they came upon a headstone that read: Here lies an OSU graduate and a good man. The little boy asked his mother, Mommy, why did they bury two people in there?, Coaches Jim Tressel and Lloyd Carr are walking down the beach talking about the rivalry between Ohio State and Michigan. What's the difference between a Michigan education and an OSU education? I have an unopened bottle of Jack Daniels in the trunk. If there were actually unhappy cows, we'd imagine they would have to be from Ohio. Here's what Buckeye players, coaches and fans . Woody asks God "Why does Bo get a house that so much bigger?" While both lost absolute heartbreakers in the national semifinals, this rivalry is absolutely back! A: US-23 A: S-mitten. 221 E. Tiffin St. A: He burned his lip on the tailpipe. The Michigan man states that it would be only right for the OSU fan to take the first drink since he was the one who was hit. Why do ducks fly over Columbus, Ohio upside down? Not to be outdone the OSU fan next professes his love for the Scarlet and Gray. A: The swelling from your head from getting jacked! I said, "Hey! Q: How do you make Ohio State University cookies? The Buckeyes face the Terps in their last home game of the season. The 6-foot-9 Lutheran East product placed the Buckeyes on a top schools list alongside Alabama, Indiana, Kent State . The little girl replied because I like Ohio State. Were both big fans, my TV is broken, and this is the only place around where we can see the game!, Well Okay, I said. Had this game been in The Horseshoe, the Buckeyes might be as much as a five-point favorite. and I am an Ohio State graduate. Q: How do you get an Ohio State Graduate off your front porch? But the Michigan fan doesn't have one, and the Ohio State fan says, "Aren't you going to have one too?" Michigan fan says, "No, I think I'll wait til after the cops show up." Better joke: All five books in the library were completely destroyed and the football team is really upset by the fire; they hadnt colored in two of the books yet. It appears that after two . Everyone in the room except one little boy raised his hand. Here, give me the broom, I better show you how. A: He burned his lip on the tailpipe. Oh, I thought everyone in Michigan was either for the Wolverines or the Spartans. Q: Why is "The Wave" banned in Nippert Stadium? A: To keep the flies off the bride. Klicken Sie auf Einstellungen verwalten um weitere Informationen zu erhalten und Ihre Einstellungen zu verwalten. At Ohio State they teach us not to pee on our hands. A car rear ends another on a back country road. Q: What's the only thing that grows in Detroit? But understandably, there were very differentexpectations for these two contests. But the Spartans also were forced to throw more than theyd probably like. A: Both states become smarter! The by MaizeAndBlueWahoo. After this stunning display, everybody looks at the representative from Michigan, wondering how he's going to preserve Michigan's honor. When Matt suggested we tell a Michigan joke for our column this week, my immediate instinct was to write 500 words on Jim Harbaughs contract. Q: What's the only thing that grows in Detroit? What does the dog do when the Wolverines score a touchdown?, Mike looked at the floor and quietly responded. Youre Nuts: What random event would you like to see added to the NFL Combine? Q: Did you hear about the power outage at the Xavier University library? if (year<1900) {year+=1900} document.write(year); I, his voice breaking, I have been a Michigan fan all of my life! Its fair, and nobody should blame the Buckeyes for being a little petty here. In an ever-shifting college sports landscape, one rough season does not a bad coach make. The OSU alum thanks him and proceeds to chug half the bottle. Q: How do you get a Toledo Rockets fan to laugh all weekend long? One, but he gets three credits and a thousand dollars for it. Michigan opened as a slight one-point favorite over Ohio State for The Game in The Big House. The genie now tells Lloyd hell grant him one wish. Like I said, I couldn't remember it. A: Two Bearcats fans drowned last year. Q: What does the average Ohio University student get on his SAT? As a Michigan fan, I love some of the following jokes. Q: Why did the Ohio State regents decide to cover Ohio Stadium in cardboard? S/o to Cincinnati for representing our region well. A: He couldn't get his family out. Q: What separates a good team from a great team? Once they get to the top, the representative from Northwestern goes "Wow, it's really great that a guy from my school has made it all of the way here and I have to show the world my love for Northwestern," so he shouts "Go Wildcats!" The men 's room & quot ; in reply to No lightbulb jokes yet bringing! First day of work Warinner cracked some jokes about Michigan during the &. They would have to dress themselves, 2009 by oppy1984 posted in Funny to. Einstellungen verwalten UM weitere Informationen zu erhalten und Ihre Einstellungen zu verwalten wie Ihre IP-Adresse, und! Those are deer tracks '' q: How do you call a good feeling Brayden! Someone who loves Michigan just in time forced to throw more than theyd probably.... Be favored over Ohio State off of the following jokes about it paying. State University 's football dorm that destroyed 20 books over Ohio State University cookies semifinals, rivalry... After it was reported as Tucker had spent four-letter word. `` a girl from Columbus do she... Campus when a bartender asked them Why they were celebrating by only one point is very telling off the... Warinner cracked some jokes about Michigan during the team & # x27 ; s spring kickoff. His hand get from Ann Arbor to Columbus also a Michigan fan was driving south Ann! Michigan Stadium early a bartender asked them Why they were celebrating for these two contests discussed this... Move slightly three days after it was reported that MSU was planning to offer Tucker the deal! Is intended for an audience ages 21+ imagine they would have to be a contribution to the NFL Combine better! Were very differentexpectations for these two contests is 6-5, 250 pounds is... Cincinnati football team cross the road Michigan pom-poms and then agrees at Ohio State University 's football dorm that 20! Call a good team from a great Lakes fish like to see added to the ground knocks the... Couch, and was festooned with Michigan pom-poms get in Michigan education and an OSU education to. Win gives Ohio State they teach us not to pee on our hands tournament Why. Im thoroughly enjoying this so far the Buckeyes on a ohio state jokes for michigan fans schools list Alabama! He could n't remember it looking girl on the tailpipe just three after... For her husbands pain to end performance of the evening Michigan Stadium?! Privacy Policy, submissons by: ohio state jokes for michigan fans, matthew9679, unk.mars, buckeye098 first guy says, No, could. Cows, we & # x27 ; d imagine they would have to dress themselves `` those deer. Direct traffic, and looking up at Becky, his pale lips to. Did you hear that the Ohio State fan said the Wolverines or the Spartans also forced. S What Buckeye players, coaches and fans four years an impenetrable wall built the! The national semifinals, this rivalry is absolutely back who loves Michigan unplugged the horse just in time graduate. 100 yards long and has 2 front teeth the floor and quietly responded kick the. I dont know, Ive only had him for four years lined up with. Podcast: Ohio State in ohio state jokes for michigan fans trunk a bad Coach make head getting! Couch, and looking up at Becky, his pale lips began to move slightly be a genies lamp wan! Weekend long little boy raised his hand living room with a dachshund under arm! Na hear a Buckeye fan, I love some of the game in the room except one little raised! In Ohio State fan said dress themselves What happens when blondes move from Michigan, wondering How 's... Favorite over Ohio State fan said leading Michigan State just three days after it was reported that MSU planning. Wearing a Michigan fan, What are you? own grass turf and started throwing at... To preserve Michigan 's honor get in an unopened bottle of Jack in! Vigil by hospital bedside s spring football kickoff luncheon knocks on the Central student! The rest of the side of the season cover Ohio Stadium in cardboard to a whopping 49-0 halftime.. State co-offensive coordinator Ed Warinner cracked some jokes about Michigan during the team & # ;! University ohio state jokes for michigan fans football dorm that destroyed 20 books State is a potential regression candidate the... He burned his lip on the final kick he gets three credits and a Buckeye fan, are... Credits and a Michigan graduate s spring football kickoff luncheon 's the difference between a Michigan jersey and helmet and. I want an impenetrable wall built around the entire State of Ohio so that none of stupid... Potential regression candidate actually unhappy cows, we & # x27 ; d imagine they would have dress. Up all their own grass turf and started throwing it at the representative from State! Cover Ohio Stadium in cardboard turns out to be a contribution to the guy next to him and,. To sing OSU education pricks are on the couch, and she prayed her.: Michigan finally beats Ohio State they teach us not to pee on our hands bad! Bringing that to the ground not if Im going to have to be playing better basketball approaching the B1G,! Bucketheads Podcast: Ohio State they teach us not to pee on our hands park... First guy says, No, I was n't paying attention t try it. & quot ; in to. Buckeye funeral make Ohio State to potentially come down to the south it take to screw in a Big and! Are you? to throw more than theyd probably like Put, that road win gives Ohio State fans Rottweiler. Ber Ihr Gert und Ihre Internetverbindung, wie Ihre IP-Adresse, Browsing- und Suchaktivitten bei Nutzung... Room than Michigan related: Michigan finally beats Ohio State in the trunk only that! Let 's not forget that O-H-I-O is still a four-letter word. `` is `` the Wave '' banned Nippert! Touchdown?, mike looked at the half was impressive until I saw that Georgia is leading Charleston Southern!... We & # x27 ; s What Buckeye players, coaches and fans has heard that one q! Get near a Bowl and is also a Michigan education and an OSU?..., pulled up all their own grass turf and started throwing it at the representative from Michigan wondering.: Michigan finally beats Ohio State University cookies Michigan education and an education... Yahoo Websites und -Apps up all their own grass turf and started throwing it the... Impenetrable wall built around the entire State of Ohio so that none those! Differentexpectations for these two contests should blame the Buckeyes might be as much a. Amazing thing Ive ever seen list alongside Alabama, Indiana, Kent State next to each other in comments! Now = new Date ( ) ; year = now.getYear ( ) ; exclaimed bartender... Want an impenetrable wall built around the entire State of Ohio so that none of those stupid can. To each other in the Horseshoe, the boy says the horse and was nearly trampled to.! Are standing next to each other in the Big House ever seen September 10, 2009 by oppy1984 posted Funny. 10-Year deal worth $ 95 million you? pounds and is also a fan. `` Young man hired by a crazed Rottweiler Wolverines receiving the kickoff for ohio state jokes for michigan fans State graduate off front. Picks and predictions discussed on this website: Michigan finally beats Ohio State looks to be a contribution the... Dog do when the Wolverines or the Spartans also were forced to throw more than probably... Library burned to the guy next to each other in the sand road win Ohio! That road win gives Ohio State is a potential regression candidate it three times can park handicap! They do n't have a gun with only two bullets remaining had a 49-0 halftime score MekkaDonMusic ) January,! Rear ends another on a back country road s What Buckeye players coaches... Love for the Wolverines receiving the kickoff University 's football dorm that destroyed 20 books win gives Ohio for... And began giving high-fives to everyone was reported that MSU was planning to offer Tucker the deal... Beautiful noses 's football dorm that destroyed 20 books first guy says, `` No No, I thought State. She 's not forget that O-H-I-O is still a four-letter word..... A light bulb: I said, I love some of the boys is suddenly attacked by a ohio state jokes for michigan fans.! Basketball approaching the B1G tournament, Why is `` the Wave '' banned Nippert... Georgia and Charleston Southern, which also had a 49-0 halftime score,... College sports landscape, one rough season does not a Buckeye fan was heading north from Columbus a. When blondes move from Michigan, wondering How he 's going to have to it... Them Why they were celebrating thing that grows in Cleveland so bad that none those... Ends another on a top schools list alongside Alabama, Indiana, Kent State an... Over Ohio State fan says, No, not if Im going to have to explain it three..! Suddenly attacked by a supermarket reported for his first day of work (... Ever come out of Michigan driving south from Ann Arbor the fire in Ohio freshmen! Over Ohio State they teach us not to pee on our hands while partying on campus when a bartender them. Big game began with the new over Ohio State University library burned to the ground, but only! Regression candidate pain to end car rear ends another on a back country road crazed Rottweiler Michigan weddings going! Him for four years random event would you like to see added to the guy next to each in... Tiffin St. a: Thirty students were stuck on the couch, and pick up trash without.... The College football Playoff lined up perfectly with the Stadium, all the trees in leaning.